Reflecting on my current situation, my emotions feel like they are visiting an amusement park. Some days they’re on the merry-go-round, other days they’re on the Takabisha at Fuji-Q Highland in Fujiyoshida, Japan.
There’s no itinery so each day is an adventure in itself. I quite often have that feeling in my belly – you know the one – just as you’re coming to the top of the rollercoaster when the ride slows down and teases you of the mix of terror and exhilaration you are about to feel. You scream and tighten your grip as the ride begins to move forward and you realise you want to get off but it gathers speed, your stomach drops into your throat and you hold on for dear life and hope to ride it out. You come up to the top again with just enough time to catch your breath, laugh before going through it all again. It usually leaves me feeling awesome that I got through it, but also usually tired and cranky with a short fuse over the silliest of things.
Knowing where your head is at can help you get off that roller coaster ride, stop eating at the all-day-buffet of dagwood dogs and fairy floss and get you putting some daily activities in place to support the person you really want to be to live the best life you want to live.
If you’re like me you have done a lot of personal development work on yourself but with only the best intentions you chase your own tail running in circles to only to end up right back where you started.
Stop. Take the pressure off. Go and do something you want to do; guilt free and really enjoy doing it. Stop self-sabotaging, guilting yourself, judging yourself and trying to be perfect. You are perfect just as you are. For now just breathe, put your hand on your heart and think of all of the people in your life, the amazing things you have in your life and how lucky you are to be in the safety of your own home.
Just show up for now. That’s all we need to do.
“Don’t let the walls cave in on you
You get what you give that much is true
Don’t let the walls cave in on you
You turn the world away from you.”
Lyrics from “Where’s your head at”, Basement Jaxx
Felix Major Buxton / Simon Ratcliffe / Gary Anthony James Webb (2001)
